I praise You in this storm! ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

Lord, I haven't spoken to You fully in a while and for that, I am sorry. You know how heavy my heart  is tonight. You know the events that happened this morning in Connecticut. You know what was in those boys' hearts when they planned to commit such an evil act that they did this morning. You knew all of this before it even ever happened. I haven't been able to get this off of my mind and I haven't been able to have a dry face all day. How someone could do this horrible act, I have no idea. Lord, lift these families up in Your arms, give them strength, and help them understand that You are with them. Lord, I know you have lost a lot of fans today because a lot of people just couldn't fathom the thought of how You could let this happen. I know I can't...but I trust in You Lord. Even though it's hard to trust in anything right now, I trust in You and only You. I don't understand how You could let something like this happen and to be honest, I'm angry and hurt and frustrated and confused. You know my feelings about this and You allow me to be angry and hurt and frustrated and confused and any other emotion I'm feeling right now. You don't hold that against me as long as I trust in You. And Lord, I do. I do trust in You with all of my heart and more. You haven't lost me. I know You do things for a reason even if I don't understand that reason and even if that reason just isn't fair at all. We will never know the reason behind anything You do until we meet You and until we are with those people we love and care about who have gone before us and who are with You right now looking down on us. I praise You in this storm, Lord. I hear You say, "I am with you" even through the rain and even through the loudness of the thunder and lightening. I praise You in this storm.

Keep those angels safe who went to be with You today, Lord. Watch over their families, help them, lift them up for they have fallen down, give them strength through all of this, heal their hearts Lord, and wash away this madness in this world. I know those families will never forget this pain. I know their hearts will never fully heal until they see their babies again. Just help them. Help them through Christmas, Lord. God, this hurts so bad! These poor parents won't be able to watch their babies open their Christmas presents this year. They won't witness the faces on their childrens' faces when they open each present. Instead of wrapping their childrens' presents, they're having to "wrap" they're children. They're having to say goodbye to their precious children that they have watched grow up. Lord, just take this away. This feels like a nightmare. I couldn't imagine going through this and I pray that I never have to as long as I live. Lord, ease my angry heart. Ease these emotions and these horrible feelings I am holding against these boys that have commited this horrible act, one of which who's still on this earth.

I count my blessings extra good tonight. I am terrified of bringing my son into this cruel world. God didn't make His people this way. I know He didn't. I believe with my whole heart that He didn't. I pray I raise my son right. I pray that Grayson never has to endure any kind of pain like this. I know I can't shelter him forever and I can't hide him from everything...but I want to so badly. I don't want him growing up in a world of hate and cruelty. When I was a kid, I don't recall things like this happeneing as much as they do now. What has this world come to?

Grayson, I love you sweet boy! I love you with all of my heart and more. I haven't even met you yet and I love you. I've never loved someone so much in my life. Lord, thank You for what I have. Thank You for the people in my life. Thank You for letting me experience motherhood. And thank You for not letting me or my family be part of a tragedy like this. I pray we never have to either. Lord, help me become a good mother. I know in my heart I will be because I have You in my heart to guide me. I have been raised right thanks to You. Let me do the same with Grayson and any other children You bless me with. ♥

"And every tear I've cried, You hold in Your hand. You never left my side and though my heart is torn, I will praise You in this storm. I remember when I stumbled in the wind. You heard my cry to You and You raised me up again. My strenth is almost gone, how can I carry on if I can't find You? But as the thunder rolls, I barely hear You whisper through the rain, 'I am with you.' And as Your mercry falls, I raise my hands and praise the God who gives and takes away."

♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥  for the 26 people who were killed today at Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newtown, Connecticut, 20 of which were young children. God bless everyone who has been affected by this horrible tragedy. Everyone, hold your kids a little tighter tonight and don't take one minute for granted with them because you never know when it'll be your last.